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The Never Ending Battle... Happy marriage, incomplete without a fight.

Despite all the wonderful and inspiring videos about accepting daughter-in-law as a daughter, the number of cases of divorce mostly reasoned to disputes with in-laws continues to rise in India. Okay, admitted, if compared to other countries, India is low on divorce rates, but it is higher on separation and bad marriage rates.
Whether we pick up cases of suicides that are reported everywhere in country due to heart-breaks or bad marriages, or unreported marital violence in the country. Additionally, in a country with major rural areas, most people do not understand marital rape till date.
No, it is not a pessimistic view, just the acceptance of true scenario of our country today. When looked analytically, most people even if in a good functional relationship do not marry their partner. Yes, mostly men.
What could be a possible reason… well, in private interviews and on the condition of confidentiality, some said, “If I truly love a girl, how I can bring her into a scenario that not only changes her status from my girlfriend to wife, but also binds her in rules that steal away her identity and smile forever?”
 In cases where many chose to let their parents find their daughter-in-law, it started off beautifully but resulting again in a sour marriages. All the sour marriages and cheating partners made me wonder if there was actually a possibility where people fell in love and stayed in it.
Look around, India suffers from bad marriages, harassment, depression and what not much more than many western countries with high divorce rates. Despite the rising women empowerment movement, the taboo of being divorced hurdles life for many.
“Oh my! How can a single unmarried guy even consider marrying a divorced girl?”
We do not even hear the expression enough, because not even our current or future generation has the capacity to understand that marital status and past can be just like an experience. Many cheat on their spouse, have several partners (with live-ins and martial relations) before getting married, but that does not count, because the big fat Indian wedding show was avoided… right?
Anyways, not to went frustrations… Just on a quest to look for a couple, who found love and sustained it through the horror of marriage…
I wondered, if I will ever find such a couple… I spoke to seniors, who were caring and devoted just not infatuated with the idea of love. I met young couples struggling to accept the twists and turns in their life because of marriage and connected relatives (in-laws + a hundred others).
I tried my luck with love, arranged, love cum arranged, Baha’I, Sahaj… god what not kind of marriages. Everyone settled with adjustments to find their own happiness in some possible way… just none with excitement of love and contentment in a relationship.
Then, I took a break and found a middle-aged couple with adult children quarreling about… quarreling for each-other’s presence more in their life. Despite spending the entire together, cooking and cleaning, going out, still seeking more of each other… I will not disclose their name… but all they told me is…
“I fell for her at first sight and she became my home…”
“I lost it all and found him, who gave me life and became my knight…”
There was more… but it was enough to give me hope that despite all the bad marriages, divorces and sour couples… some who find love can sustain it through even if it involves a dozen fights… starting it right.



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